the game of life.

A full cycle.

2011-11-28T00:32:00.002+08:00

To touch the untouchable.
To think of the unthinkable.
To believe in the unbelievable.
A sin.

It's just a full cycle.
An endless loop.

Glue sticks.
no matter how far it gets pulled them apart.

Ripples

2011-09-17T23:57:00.005+08:00

The week's getting better bit by bit.
Work's getting harder,
Pace is up-ed a little,
but all is well.
all is well.

Been learning sign language.
"how do you do?"
"nice to meet you"
oman. I think I do have some talent in this.
LOL.

Alot of things have been happening in school though.
All the undercurrents.
Just watching it erode the fragile soil.

Tempted to step in and stop a possible tsunami,
but all I can do is, stop and stare.

How can close friends just turn into arch enemies.
People who stood by each other for so long,
suddenly turning their backs against each other.
People just come and go.
Like a change of clothes.

A classic Gossip Girl.

and like a bystander,
chained to the post,
all I can do is watch the situation turn bad.

Hai.

COR

2011-09-11T20:41:00.002+08:00

Oh man.
I'm starting to love my new cca.

A step back

2010-11-29T02:20:00.000+08:00

if things were to turn out ths way,
I rather turn my back away.

Breathe.

2010-11-19T20:17:00.000+08:00

breathe.

art-mod

2010-11-14T10:25:00.001+08:00

Haven't had the time to blog much.
but i've just cleared my art mod.
quite satisfied with it.

Watch out for the photos! =)

Spate of Cheer ups.

2010-11-08T17:01:00.002+08:00

Weilee suddenly spotted a spate of cheerup messages.

2010-11-06T15:24:00.001+08:00

Saw this comment on my friend's blog.
by beholder. not too sure who it is.
but found it quite inspirational.

"
I don’t think we can forget the people we love, and experience what some people call closure. We can come to terms with it, but not turn numb. There’s no reason or rhyme but emotion, pure, simple, human emotion. Sadness is unpleasant, but isn’t wrong. Scissoring the past, censoring what we hold dear and blocking out the truth is an understandable reaction, but a step backwards."

owells.
i guess that sums it all.

Helpless.

2010-11-06T15:16:00.002+08:00

I lost 2 of my very, very close friends last week.

But I'm glad that i made more over at the other side.
one event links to another.
and i guess God has it all planned out.

First he brought me people to integrate with into the system,
sieves out the best few for me,
and slowly, one by one removes them from my life.
After a certain period of time,
he re-adds new people into the system.
repeating the whole process,
and watch me once again, live in agony.

it's a tiring process,
don't you think so?

2010-11-02T17:50:00.002+08:00

I feel terrible.

you're right.
things are no longer the same.
we're drifters.

holding on to the rope,
just seems so torturous.
i wanna let go.

but i just can't bring myself to it.

i can't hold it in.
wanna scream it out loud.
but i can't.
cos some things are just not meant to be.

jtb.
willy.
jtb.

Time and tide waits for no man.

2010-10-31T11:46:00.004+08:00

*/
"time will bury all tides,
and i guess.
all i needed was time."

what a stupid theory.

明知山有虎，偏向虎山行。

2010-10-31T09:41:00.002+08:00

This week's been pretty much of a hell week.
to get 60% for 101, and 106's bad enuf.
and now. 5% for my maths,
life's really becoming a joke.

just went crazy,
and sent that stupid W.H. an email.
hahaa. wonders what he's expression is when he reads it.
cfm fuming mad.
so be prepared dudes, for the sleeping dragon is now awoken.

明知山有虎，
偏向虎山行。

sometimes, i just can't fight against my conscience.
and thus, i've gotta face the consequences.
can't understand how some people could do it.

The Awakening.

2010-10-28T09:50:00.000+08:00

Have thought things thru'.
some things are just not meant to be.
no point sulking over it.
get up.
straighten those shirt of urs.
and move on, dude.

tomorrow's gonna be a better day.

losing control

2010-10-26T22:39:00.002+08:00

Somehow, I seem to be losing control of myself.
not knowing when to smile.
not knowing what to say.
I'm too tired to even smile.

i seem to be going back to those days.

to mask it all.

2010-10-26T09:09:00.006+08:00

如果海会说话,
如果風会愛上砂.

Everytime i see it happening,
week after week.
my mood drops skyhigh.

duno why.
there's this tingling wierd feeling.
I so wanna put on a smile.
but just can't fit into that mask.
shares has since become one of those simple masks i picked up.

knowing that things are changing.
that things are no longer the same.
i can't help, but grow distant.

life in uni has now become
nothing more than a mere facade of show-tell.
everyday seems to be like a play.
so put on those glamourous clothes.
waiting for the show to begin.

we're all.
living in this whole world of pretence.

it just hurts.

I guess i'm not good at acting.
i never was.

2010-10-24T15:41:00.003+08:00

these few days have been better.
though certain facts are still unchanged.

anyway. went for the nike race today.
felt great after the run.
simply love the shag. tired. helpless feeling.

thursday blues.

2010-10-21T09:18:00.001+08:00

feels sad.

fuck.

Run or Hide

2010-10-21T02:01:00.002+08:00

When these things happen.
Either you run as far as you can.
and possibly finding a spot,
to simply disappear into the unknown.

or bury yourself with heaps and heaps of work.
to keep yourself occupied,
till your brain has no time,
to even breathe.

Defining Norm.

2010-10-21T00:29:00.002+08:00

What is the norm?
who has the right to approve of things?
what is right.
and what is wrong?

are you in a position to comment?

Chore

2010-10-21T00:28:00.000+08:00

Attending functions where I don't feel like.
is really a chore.

Sudden Urge.

2010-10-20T20:57:00.002+08:00

I have this sudden urge
to book a flight to god-knows-where.
and really, venture out on my own,
for a couple of days.
away from family.
away from friends.

hmm. where should i go.

Lost in Reality.

2010-10-19T21:16:00.008+08:00

We are all in this world,
trying to constantly figure out who we really are.
what we want to do.
what we aim to achieve.
and what actually interest us.

Many-a-times.
we get too influenced by our surroundings,
that it ends up shaping us.
the culture.
family.
and friends.

but is this who we are?

It's about time for me to step out of the comfort zone.
To plunge into an entire world of darkness.
and finding the guiding light that brings me back up.

Every day seems to be so routine.
everything seems to be pre-planned for me.

How would it be like if one day,
everything that I once had, is lost.
My friends, my family, my education.
nothing.

What would I do?
Where would I be.

Appearance is nothing but a mere facade.
The mystery of the inner soul.
Your abiding principles that you always followed.
Are nothing more than just rules that you set for yourself.

Your hair. Be it long or short.
Your attitude.
Does it really make a difference?

Who am i.

Often, I find myself unwilling to venture forward.
To just go crazy.
Something just seems to be restricting me.
Something just seems to be holding me back.

Why is it that people can just so willingly take up smoking.
Why is it that people can go clubbing late at night, and are willing to spend it all.
To leave home, and stay elsewhere without pre-notice.
What is the reason that holds me back.

I don't wanna live a routine lifestyle anymore.
Everyday ought to be different.
Everyday should be a surprise.
I wanna be independent.
I wanna really, really try living out of Singapore.
Away from the place I call home.

But.
is it really that simple?

For one, a big reason that holds me back.
is my mum.
Would leaving her at home alone,
having her meals by herself,
make me a good son?
it just doesn't seem right.

This is probably one of the core reasons,
why I'm not fighting for a space in hall.
Even though I know how enticing it is to be staying in one.

Life is never so simple.

But.
nevertheless.
Just for one day.
or maybe a week.
I wanna escape from reality.
and find out who i am.

urgh.

Failure

2010-09-28T23:32:00.002+08:00

And it feels as though i'm going for an interview,
knowing that I'll already be disappointed.

Defeat.

2010-09-27T23:38:00.004+08:00

somehow just seem to love the feeling of defeat.

Try - Asher Book

If i walk, would you run?
If i stop, would you come?
If i say you're the one, would you believe me?
If i ask you to stay, would you show me the way?
Tell me what to say so you don't leave me.
The world is catching up to you
While you're running away to chase your dream
It's time for us to make a move cause we are asking one another to change
And maybe i'm not ready

Chorus
But I'll try for your love
I can hide up above
I will try for your love
We've been hiding enough

If i sing you a song, would you sing along?
Or wait till i'm gone, oh how we push and pull
If i give you my heart would you just play the part
Or tell me it's the start of something beautiful.
Am i catching up to you?
While your running away to chase your dreams
It's time for us to face the truth cause we are coming to each other to change
And maybe i'm not ready

Chorus
But I'll try for your love
I can hide up above
I will try for your love
We've been hiding enough

I will try for your love
I can hide up above

2x huh huhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh huh huhhh

If i walk would you run
If i stop would you come
If i say you're the one would you believe me

2009-10-13T00:16:00.002+08:00

3 quotes to share...

1st is about DOTS.

you cant connect the dots looking forward,
you can only connect them backwards.
you have to trust in something,
you got destiny life karma... anything.
Because believeing that the dots will connect down the road,
will give you the confidence to follow ur heart,
even when it leads you off the bell borne path,
and that will make all the difference.

2nd is about LOVE and LOST

Dont' lose faith.
You got to find what you love.
Your work is going to fill large part of your life,
and the only way to do great work,
is to love what you do.
if you havent found it yet,
keep looking,
don't settle.

3rd is about DEATH

No one wants do die.
Even ppl who want to go to heaven,
they don't want to die.
and yet death is the destination we all share,
no one has escaped it.
and yet death is the best invention in life.
its life changing.
it clears out the old,
and makes way for the new.
and right now,
the new is you.

adapted from a speech by steve jobs.

LUCK!

2009-07-13T09:38:00.002+08:00

They say that success is often made up of 95% hardwork,
and 5% luck.
And even though luck might only be worth that mere 5%,
it plays huge role towards ensuring success.
as without even being given that chance,
no matter how hard you try,
you will never succeed.

i'm getting pretty frustrated at having to
constantly remind myself of the VERY FEW past "lucky" chance God has given me,
to constantly console myself that maybe i'm not that all unlucky.

I've always been trying desperately to change the tide,
trying to PREVENT all the possible flaws in my "big plan".
But problems beyond my capacity and reach will always be there to deter me.

It's been a long, turbulent journey,
and i'm getting sick and tired of the unexpected.

Four leaf clover, Hu Sheng Fu,
whatever.
Luck is just what i need.

2009-07-05T17:41:00.002+08:00

Sometimes i wonder if the thoughts or the words that I say really portray what I feel.
sometimes it can be just a thought..
or things that happen to inspire me.
i think about it.
and then few days later i forget it..
and sometimes dun even remember it ever again..
I don't know why does it happen.
When I browse thru' other blogs and what'snot,
often the things that they say today, their likes and dislikes..
their mindset and philosophy,
often are consistent with those few years back.

I think I'm just too forgetful.

Then, there are times when I feel that I'm like quite fake..
always wanting to portray the politically correct side of me.
Maybe is just the environment that I grew up upon,
or the influence that my family had on me.
Till i find it hard to be real.

When I see people being so sincere,
so genuinely portraying their innocent side to others.
Often saying what they feel,
without the slightest tinge of "restraint"
I tend to envy them.
But i really dunno what's holding me back.

And I know that,
till the day i learn hw to take off my mask..
i'll nvr learn hw to change.

TheSearchEngine

2009-07-05T16:08:00.002+08:00

I would also like to blog about my online business abit. lol.

To tell you the truth,
I have put in alot of effort into this business, this idea or this concept.
Sometimes i feel that I'm like really amazed at myself.

Since the day I started out with this concept in mind,
I wanted to mould it to become something different.
I wanted to try out something that not many people has tried.
I wanted to see what sort of powers do I possess,
and if it is possible to actually reach out to hitting the goals I set.

A few goals that I set for myself before I set foot on this journey.
- I wanted it to be a reliable and professional web-based business,
to give clients the due respect that they deserve,
and to give them a sense of security that this guy means business.

- I wanted to reach out to as many people as possible with all the various marketing strategies I can think off.
Wanting to see what form of advertising would be the best means,
with the final ambition of hitting the local newspapers.

- I wanted to form partnerships with fellow entrepreneurs,
and establish links and connections with a wide array of big firms.

- I wanted to have a constant reasonable supply of viewers,
who want to visit the website to know more.

- I wanted to expand my circle of clients,
reaching out to people beyond Singapore shores.

- I wanted to see if I could work with a team of friends towards moving in a common goal, despite all other commitments.

Till date, it has already been close to a good 7 months, since we first operated.
and we have heard both criticisms and compliments.

> There are those who will tell you that the business is impossible to sustain,
as there is no need for such a concept with this IT-savvy world.
--> True, but have you ever tried finding an item on your own before?
Let for example say a trophy shop? or a
lavendar-halterback-short-dress-for-a-wedding-occasion before?
Do you know the hassle of it? going through forums, ebays and whatsnot.

> There are those who will boil you down, telling you that the price is too steep.
That $20 is not worth making people go for it.
--> True, but what can $20 get you these days.
A 2-way trip on the MRT costs about $3. 6 days of MRT ride?
And if you were to go thru' the trouble that we took,
I doubt you will ever say again that $20 was all that we needed.

> Then, there are those who constantly asks and probes of the number of clients we had so far,
how much have we earned, with a slight smirk on their face.
--> I understand the concern (or the skepticism),
but I feel that it really isn't about the money we have put in or the number of clients we had.
It is really more of the experience.

I mean, it really is.
Throughout these 7 months, we had
- registered with acra,
- learned how to use adobe to make and edit a webpage,
- made a youtube video,
- appeared to be searchable in google,
- met up with officials from entreprise-one,
- hired our own marketers through classifieds,
- liaised with the SPF,
- distributed fliers in 3 major campuses,
- thought up of at least 7 marketing strategies,
- found countless of interesting shops,
- had business dealings with people beyond the "circle of friends"
- and eventually got published in the Straits Times.

Ya. I know its true that everything may seem simple.
It might be to you, but it ain't for me.
There really is a lot of satisfaction when you manage to find something that others might want.
Cause, I always believe that anything you can think of that might exist (be realistic of course), exists.

So before you ever ask about the current profit of this business,
ask about the lessons we have learned, and the road we have taken.
For that is the most valuable experience of all.

2009-05-21T00:36:00.003+08:00

what are the odds that both of your lifts will break down tgt?
gosh! had to climb up 10 floors.
what a day.

was just thinking what wld become of K'reen if her 2 lifts break down too! lolx.

2009-05-06T23:04:00.002+08:00

Haha.
It has certainly been a whopping 72 days since I last blogged.
Well. what's happening?

Erm. okk.
Basically, within this 72 days,

- I wrote 5 essays in all to the 3 Unis,
hoping to get into ACC, but apparently,
the glimmer of hope seems to be diminishing.

- I attended all 3 Uni open houses (surprisingly free la)
and in the midst, visited Pioneer and Joo Koon 3 days after it was operational.

- I had a myriad of experiences in RBS,
all the boring moments,
hectic moments,
mischievous moments,
fearful moments,
mix-ed up moments,
angry moments,
funny moments,
sentimental moments,
and sad moments with the people in it.

And while I haven't bonded really well with the rest of the "regulars",
apparently the ones that left, have instead left me a lasting memories.
But nevertheless, it's been a fruitful 72 days then.

Moving on, I have another 72 days,
but it would definitely be much much less fun...
Office is significantly much quieter without that chatterbox.

- I went for numerous courses, like jap, waltz, adobephotoshop and now guitar.

- I finally hired my first "workers".

- I frantically studied my SATs, tried SATS, and took SATS.

- I went to Recruit Express, Adecco, P-serv, kelly Services, Staff Link, Capita. Viewed and reviewed JobsDB, JobsCentral and JobsStreet. But the irritating thing is that all jobs came only after I "signed on" in RBS...

- Frequently frustrated at the constant rising in stocks whenever I intend to buy them, and it will always be " Ah! should have bought 4 days ago..."

- I became 21.

2009-02-25T19:49:00.003+08:00

I guess God often work in miraculous ways.
He offers solutions in times of doubt and uncertainty.
He lends a helping hand when you are right on the cliff.
He gives you a window when the last door closes on you.
But,
Just when you think you have a clear path ahead of you, he adds a little adversity.
Just when you think you are saved from falling, he removes that hand.
Just when you see the window, he adds a lock.

Life has been a lot of ups and downs for me since Secondary,
but of course, became more significant in the Army.

I was afraid, and weak.
But God gave me Alfred, Pangwei and many other friends to tie me thru' the arduous journey.
to pull me thru' all the seemingly endless route marches,
and the torturous "botak" period.
Then, he added IPPT, so that I wouldn't be able to join the rest to be future specialist.
I tried and tried, training hard each day.
Just when I almost gave up,
God gave me that much needed hand, to pass and become a specialist trainee in the
School of Infantry Specialist.

It was there where i realise that he added another hurdle.
the SOC.
I was demoralised when one by one, were one step ahead of me.
It was then, when God provided me with an alternative route.
to be a scout, to escape ASLC.
Yar. I was happy. for a moment though.
but upon seeing that i was the only one i knew in my whole Hotel Coy in 3SIR Btn,
My mood dropped 12 stories high.

So there i went in 3SIR,
he gave me a bunch of other fellow comrades,
to tie me thru' this period.
He gave me a bunch of people, who are probably the best lot I have ever known.
Enci. Hui Kai. Kenneth. Samuel. Kenny. Ignatius.
Timothy. ZhouXiang. Melvin. Jason.
and Toy.
Each of them played an important role in the second phase of my Army Life.
Bringing me thru' all the fast marches,
Giving me a lift when I needed help.
Guiding me through all the tough times we had.
I was complaining then. yes i admit.
but, I was glad.

In Atec S2, i once again witness the supreme powers of God.
The unbelievable coincidences,
the unity and cohesiveness amongst the 6 teams,
the willingness for each commander
to pull ourselves together to do one-last-good-one after all that we had been through..
is just amazing.
I was really impressed by Him.

After I ord, I moved on in search of the right path to the working world.
I guess I wanted a lot of things,
a lot of ambitions, a lot of dreams.
God gave me an opportunity to work in the Ministry of Manpower.
I was totally thrilled. But He took it away from me the next day.
He then gave me friends who are willing to accompany me to find jobs,
in NbyN, Recruit Express, Kelly Service, Adecco and BGC.
It took a while.
and just when I decided to shift to learning stuffs instead,
He gave me a job. 3 jobs actually.
NTUC, RBS and CNB job.
But He added quite a bit of headache in it.

Well, now at RBS,
when I am now made to be a little more occupied with my time,
and once again renewing my earning power,
He gave Toy received his confirmation to further his studies.
He pulled away my best-best friend.

And just today,
when I thought I was left work slightly earlier,
He gave me a train that crawled from stop to stop,
making the 38mins ride a 70mins one.

Life is certainly full of ups and downs.
Full of challenges, separations and joy.
But it thought me not to take for granted, the things closest to my heart;
not to run through life so fast that I'd forget where I had been,
but also where I would want to go.

It taught me how to learn, appreciate and move on,
that in every line, there is a start and an end.
It gave me lots of challenging obstacles,
lots of crossroads, where any direction doesn't seem to matter anymore.
It taught me that I won't be able to outwit, outsmart and outlast Him.
It taught me that its time to evolve,
and emerge a stronger,
and better me.

2009-02-24T00:12:00.002+08:00

Today might seem like just any other day to others.
The day still ends in 24 hours,
the sun still rises at 7.14am,
and RBS is still in Commonwealth.

But today would mark the day,
the day
when one of my best-best friend
will learn to spread his wings and fly.

Soon, all these are no more..
No more someone who totally understands what I am thinking w/o having to mention it.
No more someone who is willing to offer me a ride when I am late or "sleepy",
One less someone who is willing to hear me talk when I'm bored.
No more cheap indian flicks,
No more late night supper.
No more someone who is willing to follow me go to places when others backout last min.
No more someone who is willing to go to places I so badly want to go.

Nevertheless,
I just hope the bonds so painstakingly forged, will never weaken,
and the memories so deeply etched, will never be forgotten.

It is said that the ties that binds us are sometimes impossible to explain.
They connect us even after it seems like the ties should be broken.
Some bonds defy distance and time and logic;
Because some ties are simply...
meant to be.

Hopefully so.

------------------------------------------------

"Who gets to determine when the old ends and the new begins?
It’s not on the calendar, it’s not a birthday, it’s not a new year,
it’s an event —big or small, something that changes us,
ideally it gives us hope,
a new way of living and looking at the world,
letting go of old habits,
old memories.

What's important is that we never stop believing we can have a new beginning,
but it's also important to remember amid all the crap
are a few things really worth holding on to.."- Meredith.

2009-02-22T22:01:00.002+08:00

Free-Ants

All these years, all a-lone
The wind'd passed, the rain'd gone
There were tears, there were wrongs
Still remember what we held dear

True "friends" love, will then know
Is lonely, to say goodbye
There are dreams, there is you
In our hearts

Friends walk this life to-ge-ther
Those days will ne-ver return,
Just one word, just one life
A life-time, over acup of wine

Withfriends will ne-ver be lonely,
Lifelong friends would un-der-stand
There are wounds, there is pain
Must still go,
our seperate ways.

2009-02-13T23:48:00.002+08:00

OH man.
So many people are wearing army shoes on the streets these days.
And even though I'm not really a total-army-hater,
but YUCKS!
They just don't look nice.

2009-02-01T21:08:00.003+08:00

I totally hate it when people make religion just another money making opportunity.
Where people use the trust and faith of others to earn money for themselves..

In bangkok for example,
tons and tons of people flock from one temple to another praying and worshipping the gods above.
but with it comes a price.
First, a 30Baht entrance fee.
Then, 20 baht to buy joysticks and a few gold paper.
Followed by another 80 odd baht to LOAN a robe for prayer.
or 20 baht for you to throw coins in some bowl.

While the price might be low, and nothing much to some,
I mean, isn't this something quite saddening to witness?
People are now making use of others faith to make money these days.

In the streets of Thailand,
people find tapping into religion so profitable that
even fake protection plates are being sold and bargained for.
I mean, there shouldn't be a price to beliefs and faith anyway.

Even in Singapore,
while it the situation is much better,
Ping an fu's now cost $2 in some temple,
some incense papers costs $3,
and having your name handwritten on a board in marker costs $20..

With general costs of living rising over the years,
it looks like the inflation has not spared religions,
or at least temples, as well..

well, at least joysticks here,
are still free..

2009-02-01T16:26:00.002+08:00

Zouk's really an eyeopener.
It's not like what I thought it would be.
cause....
"Phuture is like a thousand, million times better" -xj
and I totally agreeee..

2009-02-01T15:35:00.002+08:00

Work can be really, really boring.
Sometimes, it is quite a torture to act busy,
to look busy,
and appear as though there are tons of work to do.

You cannot read.
You cannot surf.
And all you can do is navigate thru' excel words and ppt,
typing words..
words that do not seem to make much sense.

It's really boring.
So much so that,
I have already prepared instructions for my understudy when I leave office...

2009-02-01T14:50:00.005+08:00

Haven't been updating this blog for quite some time,
so shall touch on first about my Chinese New Year experiences in Bangkok!

They say photo speaks a thousand words,
so my this post shld be quite long...

I shall post the slightly more interesting photos here,
but for the rest, you can always find them on facebook.

Doesn't this look like the RBS logo? lol. it seems to be called Central here.

They say in every ten thousand lobsters, there is only one blue lobster.

THis is a real cool picture taken with the CASIO digital camera.

After a long day shopping, its always feel good going for a little massage.

It may look simple, but it is definitely the best porridge i have ever tasted in the whole wide world!

I have seen dyed hair, but ever seen a dyed poodle?

They say with credit cards you can have numerous discounts. With the MBK smart purse, you can even save 2 baht when you visit the toilet!

Doesn't this look very familiar?

I guess these two should be artistes ba. Anyone knows who are they??

The Oh-so-ever familiar A&W. And my only regret in this trip, was to not eat in there... Even in Bangkok, A&W are few...

Short and stubby Bananas

Can you spot the buddha head...

Doesn't this look like the wooden elephant in Vivo?

You have seen black, white, brown eggs. but have you seen so many pink eggs?

Life's really much relaxing in Thailand than here......

2009-01-30T15:52:00.000+08:00

Sometimes I find that the work I do in *** is rather redundant.
Often, I find the measures and procedures taken by my department
to prevent potential fraud cases from happening are a tad too much..
but sshhhhh.....

2009-01-29T15:59:00.000+08:00

"...And if they can't even handle something like army,
finding ways and means to try and escape it,
this only goes to show that in life, they carn even handle a little hardship.
If trouble comes,
they will definitely be the first to run away.
These are the type of people who wun earn my respect,
and I doubt they'll gain others' too." -Eddie..

And i totally agree.

2008-12-16T01:11:00.002+08:00

my life's pretty f-uped nw..
i'm jobless.

i desperately want a job.
anyjob.
any job u hear me!

when the opportunites are plenty,
i rejected them.
when the opportunities fade away,
i can no longer find them anymore.
no matter how hard u try.

its really quite sad,
to see dream bubbles start bursting.
leaving nothing but a pool of mess below.
quite frustrating too, actually.

All the zoo stuff,
the hotel fantasy,
the casino dream,
and the stat-board goal.

are like roadblocks.
they have become a deterrent.
they have caused damage.
life's pretty unfair.

2008-12-16T00:55:00.002+08:00

I realise life's pretty funny.
when you first meet someone,
you probably would see everyone very biased-ly.
the slightly chio-er would seem very chio.
the slightly ugli-er would seem very ugly.
the slightly more open, would seem very open.
the slightly quieter, would seem very quiet.

as you progress slowly,
your mind starts to tell you things slightly differently.
your impression of people start to change.
and this change can be a little more shocking than u cld imagine.

people who were "once" chio, might not be perfect.
people who were "once" ugly, might not be that bad after-all.
people who were "once" open, might not be able to last long..
people who were "once" quiet, might have a different. a totally different life that you didn't know.

Gradually,
perspective of people start to change.
people are no longer the ones that u once thot they were.
you start to classify people.
Good People, bad people.
Close friends, moderately ok friends, distant friends, best-to-not-meet friends.
most often start off first in the category,
then slowly slips the way down the line.

then of cos there are those stucked on top too.
bt those are few.

slowly as time starts to pass,
memories fade.
contacts increase,
but conversation decreases.
decreases.
silents.

den one fine day,
when u look back at these memories.
on how close a friend u once were,
you suddenly start to realise that the
line u once drew start to fade away.
you no longer see that person as a chio-ugly-open-quiet person.
He is now a friend.
a long-lost friend.

2008-12-12T22:26:00.000+08:00

created something interesting.
go check it out...
www.the-search-engine.synthasite.com

2008-11-29T22:44:00.002+08:00

Adapted from Wikipedia.

"In Sept'08, Sundaravej was removed from office by the Constitutional Court of Thailand.

By October'08, Wongsawat was unable to access his offices, which were occupied by protesters from the PAD.

Protests force closure of Thailand's int'l airport.

The Thai government removed the police chief from his post and shifted him to a relatively unimportant position.

Thailand's army chief told the government on Wednesday to step down..."

What a chaotic mess.
and more importantly,
I CANT GO FOR MY THAILAND TRIP anymore!!!
dammit!

"Thais are also well-known for their friendliness and hospitality, leading to the country's so called reputation as the "Land of Smiles."" - Wikipedia.org
really?

2008-11-29T22:16:00.002+08:00

lol. i used to think that covering food with a cover,
was to protect it from the unwanted radiation emited by the microwave oven.
i guess, i was wrong all along.
its actually to prevent the liquid content from spilling out of the bowl,
to hold steam for fast and even cooking.
haha. how naive i was..

2008-11-23T23:30:00.001+08:00

we will all set off with the same kind of mindset to find jobs...
wanting to find big and ambitious ones,
wanting to find those with gd sounding reputation..
bt eventually,
we will all succumb to the sad reality tt all these are hard to get,
and probably end up going for jobs,
nt to earn money,
bt just so nt to let the bank acc drop to negative..

2008-11-16T23:36:00.002+08:00

Just came back from a wedding dinner.
the food was rather nice.
I saw alot of distant relatives that i din't even knew existed,
and I could tell that the relationships b/w
us and the slightly-more-distant-relatives are actually becoming quite distant too.

This is quite a saddening trend,
as cousins and nieces that i once played with,
have grown bigger, taller and are becoming more unfamiliar.
We are no longer as close as we once were,
playing with the yellow toy trucks, the mcdoodle board, and talking about pokemon.
We now talk about boring and mundane stuffs like university plans, school.
So much so that, it becomes a little awkward now.

Then i start wondering.
if i happen to get married one day..
and i invite close relatives, or rather people i can talk to.
den i probably would just need 6 tables.
one for relatives on my dad's side. (5+2+1)
one for relatives on my mum's side. (6+4)
one for my Secondary school friends.
one for my JC friends and Army friends.
one for my University friends.
and one for me and my immediate family. (4+?)

oh how different would that be.
how much money would i be able to save too..
but then i tink again.
the bride's side would have her chunk of family,
and it probably wouldn't be just so little anywayz.
soo. oh crapz.

2008-11-15T00:49:00.000+08:00

Just read thru my archives,
and realised that some entries were quite interesting..
lol

I just realised that 3 years ago,
on this very day,
my blog was born.

Happy birthday blog.

2008-11-12T13:44:00.004+08:00

The scouts are the eyes and the ears of the battalion.
They do stuff you can't,
see things you don't,
go to places you won't.
To them,
it's part of their job to reduce the uncertainties and to be sure of the unsure.
In short, they suffer...
so that many others don't.

This is RECCE.

2008-11-11T17:02:00.004+08:00

Well,
today marks the date of my freedom.
it's been a long while since my ord calendar did the countdown..
till i almost forgot the message that will pop out when the counter hits zero.
i've finally gotten my pink ic.

Unlike the school times,
i guess this is probably one of the hardest times for me to leave.
to get away, and move on.
somehow or rather,
it's pretty hard to leave this time round.

It was very hard to say goodbye.
I walked from bunk to bunk,
wanting to say my last words for them,
but all i could do was just sit there,
by their side.

In camp,
we would often walk from room to room,
chitchatting,
joking,
watching movies,
fighting,
doing some bodyart.
we would bitch about people we din't like,
we would sing songs till dawn.
At home,
all there is juz the three of us.
haha. i feel so lonely!!!!

Nevertheless,
i am glad that i have not wasted my 1yr10mths here,
and i am proud to say that i will leave this place,
with no regrets.

With pride we lead..

2008-11-09T23:20:00.003+08:00

ohmy.
as i look at my count down timer slowly but quickly
inching second by second towards the 11th of november,
i cant help but feel happy.

1 day, 40minutes, 24seconds.

Indeed, army had been a very long and tiring one for me.
But it certainly was an opportunity for me to learn several things.
For one, it defintely was a chance for me to pick up some leadership skills,
to choose and dictate the direction and tempo for my team.

We were empowered the heavy responsibility of taking care for the welfare of others,
as well as the safety of my buddy.
another person's life was now placed under our care.

Army showed me how vulnerable was life.
It gave me the opportunity to handle emergencies,
witness suicide attempts,
and taught me how to face it bravely.

It taught me perseverance, and endurance.
It taught me that rank matters, but only to a certain extent.
It taught me the importance of time and being on time.
It taught me that people often scold,
not because they want to,
but because they have to.
and it is often those that keep quiet,
that are the worse of the lot.

It showed me the ugly side of people, who live on a mindset that
1) "if it doesn't benefit me, whatfor do it."
2) "the whole world owes me a living, but i better not show it to others that i'm the real bad guy"
3) "there's always someone else who would do it".
4) "he's the boss, whatever he say counts. who cares if i know it's not the best way to do things" attitude.
But then, there was also the good side.
people who are willing to sacrifice.
people who are willing to voice out their opinion.
people who do not choose to stay in the background, but stand out.

it gave me the opportunity to meet hundreds of other people.
There in BMT, there were a whole bunch of young recruits waiting to be enlisted.
It was there, that i met 46 of them.
Then in SISPEC, there were a few officerswannabe and whatsnot.
i met 36 of them.
Then in RCC, the suay people gathered together for a course.
i met 100 of them.
And finally in 3SIR.
Signals, there were about 12 i know.
ATGM, there were about 9 i know.
Pioneer, there was like about 5 i know.
Scout platoon, there were 73.

the total number of people the Army let me meet, was close to 300 people.
pretty amazing.
So much so that, when u walk on the streets.. its really not surprising to see one or two streaming in. or maybe three. four or five.

But most importantly,
it gave me many friends,
friends that i can say fought along with me.
friends that i won't want to forget.

The one year ten months is finally over,
but the journey had only just begun.
(trust me, reservist sounds worse.)

2008-11-09T16:10:00.002+08:00

One of my friend shared with me something that i think is quite true.
Alot of us, often have many opinions.
many thoughts,
many feelings.
However,
manyatimes we just choose to stay in the background,
quietly listening.
quitely observing.

Why do you choose to be so
afraid of sharing that opinion,
scared of giving that thought.

i guess its time to stand up for yourself,
and tell the others straight,
what you think is right, or wrong.
and where you want to go.

its not like you will be getting some beating or what.
why be afraid?
and if army havent taught us anything yet.
now is the time.
its time to change.

2008-10-27T22:51:00.000+08:00

had another one of those best days in my life.

2008-09-15T21:59:00.002+08:00

Just called a fwen of mine,
he was from 41sar.
eventhough he was not a scout,
but when i asked him how was his atec,
he sounded confident and proud of his unit.

he knew most of the co-ord points like the back of his mind,
he could tell me paths that he walked, that i never knew existed.
maybe its just him tt's like tt.
or a competitive streak.
but, i'm really impressed.

2008-08-16T22:46:00.002+08:00

do people really donate out of good will?
or izit cause...
1) they just wanna empty out their purse to make it less heavy.
2) they are with their girl and they want to make themselves appear generous.
3) they want something good in return.
4) they are interested in vouchers that might be given out.
5) they just find the lil' girl they are donating to pretty.

then again.. on the receiving side,
are they really volunteering to spend their Saturdays outside helping, out of good will?
or izit cause...
1) they just want the cip points.
2) they were forced into it.
3) or worst still, the undisclosed commission that comes with the donation.

how many people are actually donating and volunteering out of their own will?
how many people are really that kind?
its a dog eat dog world.
people are selfish.
face it.

2008-08-16T22:37:00.001+08:00

i've realised that it is much more worthwhile
to spend money on luxury items than food.

2008-08-02T20:47:00.002+08:00

Heroes do not have to be people in special costumes
or people with super strength abilities.

They do not need to be people of high authority and power,
or those who have super-high expectations of themselves and others.

they can be ordinary people,
just like you,
and me.

Fifty-four foxtrot.
gleamz.

2008-08-02T20:45:00.003+08:00

sian.
my unit suckx.
gotta go outfield on the national day.
my unit suckx.
sian.

2008-07-31T23:23:00.001+08:00

sometimes..
we just keep bumping into one shit after another.
after another.
after another.

when then,
can we clear our name.

2008-07-31T23:22:00.000+08:00

i hate www.cdc.com.sg.
loads totally slow.

2008-06-30T00:13:00.000+08:00

Jonathan Trager, prominent television producer for ESPN, died last night from complications of losing his soul mate and his fiancee. He was 35 years old. Soft-spoken and obsessive, Trager never looked the part of a hopeless romantic. But, in the final days of his life, he revealed an unknown side of his psyche. This hidden quasi-Jungian persona surfaced during the Agatha Christie-like pursuit of his long reputed soul mate, a woman whom he only spent a few precious hours with. Sadly, the protracted search ended late Saturday night in complete and utter failure. Yet even in certain defeat, the courageous Trager secretly clung to the belief that life is not merely a series of meaningless accidents or coincidences. Uh-uh. But rather, its a tapestry of events that culminate in an exquisite, sublime plan. Asked about the loss of his dear friend, Dean Kansky, the Pulitzer Prize-winning author and executive editor of the New York Times, described Jonathan as a changed man in the last days of his life. "Things were clearer for him," Kansky noted. Ultimately Jonathan concluded that if we are to live life in harmony with the universe, we must all possess a powerful faith in what the ancients used to call "fatum", what we currently refer to as destiny.

2008-05-24T15:28:00.001+08:00

after missing 3 interviews.
after rejecting 18 phone calls.
after receiving an email from them to wish me good lck for my future endeavour.
engineering science is back to haunt me again.
i guess they really wanted to see me.

2008-05-24T15:13:00.003+08:00

ohsee: what are u guys doing?
us: telting maps for nxt wk outfield and 4ntm.
ohsee: see la. u guys always do things the last minute, come to last minute then chiong. after bookout timing den 'll do things much faster. so what time are u guys intendig to book out? dun book out so late.
us: (we just kept quiet)
[we hve been doing things non-stop for thepast few days, and here comes these comments.. sometimes i dun really know if the company i'm fighting with, is really worth fighting for.]

2008-05-24T14:52:00.002+08:00

sometimes i just hate it when people ask me,
why i dun let my men do it.
it's cos i know,
that they ain't resting too.

purlease.
we are no longer the almighty 64.
we aren't the company minus that u once said we were.
we are just the barely making it 33.
the leftovers. the unfortunate 33,
who are hesistating to down,
not because we carn.
but because we dun wan.
we dun wan to leave behind the burden to the remaining few.
sometimes it really disgusts me to hear ppl pursuading others to go for it.
or people who are really perfectly fine,
saying that they downed because they were suffering.
hey!u oh-so-fit-souls.
think about the ppl left behind.
dun be so selfish.
purlease.

2008-05-19T00:19:00.002+08:00

commanders have a very important role to play.
specs especially.
no matter how small it may ever seem,
please dun give up,
and please dun neglect it.
cos whatever decision you make,
or whatever detail you just happen to overlook,
comes with a price to pay.

this outfield experience was a really traumatic one,
i shant say what's it about,
but one thing's for sure,
its never going to leave my mind for a long long time..
i've just stepped into a path that i've never seen before,
a whole new world that i would never ever want to visit again.
just remember.
life's important.
please dun play with it.

2008-05-11T11:16:00.001+08:00

The Square Root of 3

I fear that I will always be
A lonely number like root three
A three is all that's good and right,
Why must my three keep out of sight
Beneath a vicious square root sign,
I wish instead I were a nine
For nine could thwart this evil trick,
with just some quick arithmetic
I know I'll never see the sun, as 1.7321
Such is my reality, a sad irrationality
When hark! What is this I see,
Another square root of a three
Has quietly come waltzing by,
Together now we multiply
To form a number we prefer,
Rejoicing as an integer
We break free from our mortal bonds
And with a wave of magic wands
Our square root signs become unglued
And love for me has been renewed.

2008-05-04T20:53:00.000+08:00

人長大了，
就會有越來越多的沒有，
有越來越多沒有可能辦到的事，
長大後，
也有越來越多沒有辦法回應的話，
長大後，
有越來越多沒有人照顧的時候，
長大後，
有越來越多沒有理由的愛情挫折，
人長大後，
真的有好多的沒有，
但是讓人長大的，
也是這些沒有。

2008-05-03T15:42:00.005+08:00

tictoc ticktock
tic toc
ticktocktictoc
tic
tock
t i c k
t o c
tictoc tick tock
ti ck to ck
tic tick
tocktoc

guess what?
2 more days to........

2008-05-03T15:33:00.002+08:00

today the engineering science guy called again.
050308/ 0945.
He: Hello, can i speak to Willy.
Me: Yes, speaking.
He: Aren't u supposed to be at the interview?
Me: o ya. Sorry i overslept. (what a really bad excuse)
He: okk. looks like i have to arrange another interview for u.
Me: ok.

He puts down phone. 1minute later, the phone rings again.
and i juz let it ring..

+ i just realised i lost my passion for the esp alr.

2008-05-03T15:07:00.003+08:00

many things have happend over the past 4 months...
one of which was that am-es-kay escaped
and many youknits have been deployed to catch him.
and it was then,
that i figured out that probably.. probably..
monopoly has some roots in Singapore..

2008-04-15T15:29:00.000+08:00

dun ever trust hollywood movies again.
no matter how nice their poster looks....
the forbidden kingdom sucks. really.

---------------------------------------
today i realised how enthu ppl can be with their job.
when it comes to insurance,
they sure hired the right people.

or izzit just the money...

Naive singaporeans

2008-02-16T23:33:00.002+08:00

went to bugis and saw this guy
claiming that he can is willing
to do a good luck charm for FREE,
provided they would provide him with $2
for him to put into a small transparent pocket,
which he wld return to them in the end.

so this guy and his accomplices
went on to talk and talk abt the miracles of his gd luck charm.
and eventually asked who wanted to try it out,
whilst stressing that it would be absolutely free.
in the end, 30 odd spectators decided to give it a try since it was oni $2.

Ritual performed.
Money placed in the pocket, and placed on the table.
After which he blatantly said that beside this pocket,
one wld need to obtain another gd luck cloth to go with it,
if nt the the "miracle pocket" wld not work
and this cost 20$.

all the 30 spectators paid another 20$ for it.
AND THE BEST PART,
another group of 15odd spectators paid for more...

went ard and came back,
there he was busy conning yet another batch of people,
with his little gimmick.
WHAT NAIVE SINGAPOREANS.

2007-12-26T01:16:00.000+08:00

just some random post....

i just realised that
santa and satan are spelt so similarly..

2007-12-22T00:42:00.000+08:00

they say that its a big world out there,
well den..

What are the chances of meeting...
3 of my recce seniors at tanahmerah mrt on the way to a movie,
1 of my 3s1r mates while shopping,
and another 1 of my recce senior on the way back?

What about the chances of meeting...
one of my recce men infront of this nafnaf shop,
and another one of my recce fellow mate.
on the same day,
at the same time,
at the same spot.

Now what about the probabilty of this two events
happening to the same person?

hmmmmm.....
mb i do have some affinity with recce afterall.
or rather, its a sign to show that i can never run away from it............

2007-12-15T21:00:00.000+08:00

wad's the difference b/w a commander and a man.
have you ever thought of that?
or is there even much of a difference b/w the two?
yes, i agreee
the pay is different.
the responsibilities are different.
but in the army,
the ultimate difference that divides the two is just
the tick that u put in the box during bmt.
(*sidetrack alittle* which also means its easy to think how a man wld think)

let's face it.
commanders are no superhumans.
commanders are no gps systems.
commanders are no siao-on freaks.
commanders are no perfect creatures.
commanders are just people.
yes people like you and me.
and yes,
surprisingly,
we do fail.

i just so hate it when people expect us to be such
infallable-superduper-prideless-creatures,
who are nothing much but just
something to play ard with,
someone to boss ard with.
STOP scolding us.
STOP threatening us..
mister regulars.
cos unlike u guys,
we are just normal humans.
we are here not because we want to,
but because we were not given a choice to.
and REMEMBER,
u were once us too.

having said that, however,
i must stress that i'm not saying that now, we can avoid it,
and take up a start-slacking mentality.
since ultimately, it was indeed part of our decision.
neither am i saying that we should just sob and cry
because of the choices we make.
but we should still try our best.
and hopefully
be appreciated.

respect, reputation, pride, trust, belief
are big words thrown around.
and it certainly means alot to me.
in a matter of 3 mths (or actually 1 mth if u were to count it right)
we noobs are gonna take over the whole company,
and lead the old men.
i know i dun wanna fuck up the first mission,
cos the first mission w the men is the one
that leaves the deepest impression in them.
i dunno when that time will come,
but i know it will.
so before that time comes, and everybody screws things big time,
i guess its time for me
to put on my gears and try and learn to be the
infallable-superduper-gpsinbuilted system
that everyone of us were expected to have.

goodluck!

2007-10-06T14:29:00.000+08:00

So, when you feel like hope is gone
look inside you and be strong
and you'll finally see the truth
that a hero lies in you.

And then a hero comes along
with the strength to carry on
and you cast your fears aside
and you know you can survive
--------------------------------

just had rti e day b4.
it was terrible.
it was torturing.
it was bad.
but..
at least it is over.

2007-09-28T20:31:00.001+08:00

well.. sometimes you just carn escape from fate.
after a close brush against a brunei trip,
there we are, once again,
facing yet another possible one..

i just hate your attitude. change it!

i'm sick and tired of all this nonsense.
my life's just like a roller coaster,
and i'm definitely afraid of heights.

2007-09-28T20:31:00.000+08:00

sometimes,
i juz dun wana argue.
i juz dun wana explain.
i juz dun wana reason.
please. ENOUGH!

2007-08-31T02:12:00.000+08:00

TO MY BLOG

HAPPY HUNDREDTH-POST BIRTHDAY!!!

WOO HOO! WHOOO HHHOOOOOO!!
OH YEAHH!

2007-08-31T00:45:00.000+08:00

taiwan taiwan.
its been a long time since i last blogged.
me juz came baq from the very first **** sponsored trip there.
let's just say it was a very interesting trip ba.

certain things are meant to be censored,
so i shan't go into too much details.
but my primary role there is to be one of those....
important people who make the missions possible..
the highly requested,
highly sought after,
most frequently searched,
the most popular,
supporting staff. aka. enemies aka.
the SAI KANG WARRIORS.

nevertheless,
we had our fair share of fun.
oh and one thing i realised was that
the villagers were v kind.
they gave us longans and pineapples.
i repeat. GAVE.
plusplusplus. they were big. juicy. sweet. and free.
na! here's a photo of it.

then there's this photo of me riding this ****.
hey. btw i'm already liscensed to drive this.

NEXT.
was the typhoon.
guess many of you heard of the typhoon.
haha.
the biggest typhhooon in taiwan's history.
the most anticipated disaster.
and not even a single wind that we felt.
basket. we had to close the windows and stuff.
end up feeling even hotter than a typical normal day.
but then again, if only i was pulled out one day later,
i would get to experience it.
cos i was in the exact same stretch of road that was shown on the news,
as one of the affected areas the following day.
dunno lucky or unlucky..
and here's a photo of my friend being blown off...

and we were banned frm going out,
and as a result,
some of us became hungry...

in singapore we had the 4 white letters : S L O W
in taiwan they had their....

it just seemed so wierd.

kay. that's it.
now moving on to the long awaited
R N R!
all we did was to........

we ate loads of food.
and i mean loads..... here are some of them.
< insert pictures >

( Ahh forget it. dun tink u all 'd be interested in hw e fd looks like anw.
cos take v long to upload oso.. yup. bt jus know that i ate alot of nice food. NICE FOOD!! and that i realised that Chou dou fu ain't tt gd afterall. so dun believe ppl when they say its smelly, but nice. cos it ain't. its juz sweet....)
(ohoh but one of the must tries are the ji pa, the dan bing, the pineapple prawn, adn the chocolate THICK toast. omg. heaven.)
it just felt like it was ages ago.
i wan go back there again!

temperature wise lehh... ratheer hot.
30 degree celcius

how i know?
there!
the thermometer building.

then, there was this other copycat.
watch.

familiar?

there was also this crazy machine,
whom one cld win an ipod w it.
would u really try it?
even if it means just 10NT (50c) per try??????

kaykay...
photos galore!!!!
first we remove the rock.

den we shift the mini stone pagoda.

kay. all in position le?
smile!

2007-08-30T23:08:00.000+08:00

seeing how great the taiwan trip was..
do you feel that you really want to go there?
are u starting to feel that u shld have been in my place?
well lemme tell u tt my luck was shit there.

THE SERIES OF UNFORTUNATE EVENTS
-> was chosen to go to outfield (3d2n) : oni 4/11 ppl chosen.. mini lucky draw.

-> we didnt even get a tiny weeny glimpse of the typhoon, and in the end were damn hot for 3days.

-> apparantly someone stole 150$ from my wallet, adn til date he was not found.

-> i realised my mp4 had spoit.. the lcd turned from red to black....

-> and now i realised that i had just lost my 11b.50bucks and lots of scolding i guess.

-> now go to search.blogger.com, and try searching on 11b lost. look at the no. of entrees that people write who had lost it, but found it back in the end. 80%. at least.

-> made police report, go to S1, realised tt kannt get 15A(temporary 11B) until monday, which so happens to coincide with me being in pasir laba for the nxt 8wks. in other words,i have to make a special trip back camp.

-> wad's next?!

they say that shit happens.
if tt's the case,
then i must be having diarrhea.

2007-08-11T16:31:00.000+08:00

yo. just some little updates...

- i've finally gotten my military driving license!
after 30 long, hectic days of non-stop driving,
it feels gd to have finally passed it.

plus u really notice much more things on the rd
that u have nvr bothered to take note of.
(and that Mandai Camp serves gd food.)

- i'm going taiwan real soon.
somehow, i quite look forward to the trip.
be enemies,
catch troopers,
fresh rations,
go for rnr,
machiam like holiday....

the feeling of awaiting to go abroad is gd.
the feeling of being abroad is gd.

2007-07-04T18:33:00.000+08:00

bring me out.
bring me out of this freaking place.
bring me back to where i was.
bring me, to where i belong.

2007-06-30T14:16:00.000+08:00

driving aint easy.

2007-06-01T23:30:00.000+08:00

today was the very official last day in sispec.
all of us were rather sad that we had to leave each other.
but we all congratulated each other,
and gave our blessings.
i suddenly/momentarilly felt that,
i din really wanted to leave here at all.
really.

oh and one more thing i want to add is that,
on my way back,
i saw this guy wearing a teeshirt,
w a design v similar to my laviver shirt.
juz that the words are different, and the font is different too.
but the colour, placings are all quite similar.
my gdness.
i should have copyrighted it man.

2007-05-31T12:26:00.000+08:00

there are many things i'd like to post abt tt happend tru'out these 11 wks..
but always carn find the time...
so juz post some randomly here..

1) the first few wks, morale was very low.
everyone wanted to down pes,
everyone wanted to be slack,
everyone wanted to go ocs,
everyone juz din want to be here.

2) i've seen things i've never seen before.
the ants that u c on ur cupboard/table/wall/door/floor is nothing.
have u ever seen a company of ants living on a leaf?
have u ever seen many of such leaves in the same tree?
have u ever seen many of such trees within the same spot?
field camp have made me notice so many of such things.

3) i've learnt that even the smallest things are annoying.
- a battalion of ants crawling onto you as u rest.
- grasses tickling u annoyingly while u lie.
- acres and acres of mimosa prickling u while u prone.
- one whole troop of houseflies hovering ard u b4 u sleep
- a brigade of commando troopers fanatically piercing thru ur flesh after u sleep.

4) i now know the importance of psp.
half of my platoon has it now...........

5) route march are the
most tiring,
most time consuming,
most large scale,
most physically demanding,
most mentally demanding
physical training of them all.
and also the most useless of them all.

6) i am finally a corporal.
bigger rank compared to none other than our very own.....
.....
....
...
.....
armskote man,
and storeman. -.-

7) i juz realised tt i might be able to strike lottery anytime soon.
29.95% - aslc
25% - signals
15% - armour
15% - engineer
15% - arti
0.05% - recce
and i so happen to get myself into it.
wonderful.
recce. the most siong unit of them all...

- life's juz soooooooo interesting. -

2007-05-01T09:44:00.000+08:00

elfabirds

ehh be see di yee ef jee,
edge eye jay kay el am and old pee.
queue are ass, tee you vee,
doubleyou axe, why & zee,
naw eye noe mi ehh be see,
necks tyme wun eu seng wid mee.

2007-04-08T03:19:00.000+08:00

they say the grass is always greener on the other side.
sispec. ocs. others.

people in ocs are complaining:
abt the confinement period,
the tough training,
while thinking if it'd be better being in sispec.

people in sispec are complaining:
abt the tough training,
wondering why they cldnt make it to ocs in the first place,
while thinking if it'd be better being in the other vocations.

people in other vocations are complaining:
abt the tough training (having to endure thru' tons of lectures),
wondering what if they had made it into sispec in the first place,
while thinking that it was such a waste not to be in sispec or ocs.
and the cycle goes on....

they say the grass is always greener on the other side.
but izit really that green?

well. i'm in hotel coy,
and our morale's rather low.
its the same old trainings,
the same old shit again.
added with a little bit of spice..

within my section,
2-ooted,
1-deferred,
1-pending.
from a total of 11 men, to nw, 7men.
great. -.-

2007-03-25T15:58:00.000+08:00

pasir laba is so damn far away lah!
WTH.
30mins to go there by car,
30mins to come baq...
juz a brief excursion to the camp wld take an hour.
my gdness....
my gdness.....

if oni it was paya lebar.

2007-03-11T19:39:00.000+08:00

today is my bookout day, bookout bookout..
today is my bookout day o bookout day.

onessong.blogspot.com *click* [no visible updates]
carine-.blogspot.com *click* [no visible updates]
herbalfreshie.blogspot.com *click* [no visible updates]
weiweiwei.blogspot.com *click* [no visible updates]
deathtimestories.blogspot.com *click* [gone]
wahhhhh. 3months lehhh.. no updates?
haha. i guess i din missed anything much ba.
*nonoNO. u are nt looking at the same post!
its juz tt erm....*

hmmm. guess my first 3mths is abt to come to an end..
to all who are abt to be enlisted...
TWO MORE DAYS TO POP!!
haha. ok. well... i guess these 3 mths have passed really quick for me.
in a blink of an eye,
my sunflower seeds

have became

became a full bloomed sunflower plant le.
*my point here is to show tt time flies. nt to show off my superb gardening skills hor.*

well... erm. ya. the feeling of having 2 more days to POP.
well.. its kinda mixed feeling la.
on one hand, its quite sad to see some of my platoon mates leaving,
or even having to say a simple gd bye.
bt then again, I NO NID GO TEKONG AGAIN!
ok.wait. mb i shld reswitch the pts to make it sound better. okwadeva.

Many atimes we worry.
When i first gt my enlistment date,
i worry abt the ppl whom i wld meet and the life i'd have to endure.
When i first did my SOC run through,
i worry abt juz falling off tt steep slope and getting stuck in the barb wire.
When i first did my 4km route march,
i worry abt hw i was going to complete my 24km route march.
When i first ate my field ration,
i worry abt hw i was going to endure eating tt shit for 6 days.
When i first knew tt i wld be getting my Alvl results,
i worry abt hw the results wld turn out.
When i did complete my 24km route march,
i worry abt hw long i 'd be confined juz bcos of tt stupid piece of underwear.
And now, when i'm juz abt to POP,
i think abt all my worries and wonder. why did i worry in the first place.
So to those who are abt to get enlisted,
Enjoy ur BMT. cos the nxt thing u gonna worry abt,
is which unit wld u be posted into, and abt the ppl whom u wld meet and the life u'd have to endure.
and the cycle goes on and on and on....

kk. this rather rushed post.
cos no time le.
mb 'll edit a little sometime soon ba.
cos nw i'm seating here,
worrying tt i am going to be late....... =(

2007-01-26T22:22:00.000+08:00

today is my bookout day, bookout bookout..
today is my bookout day o bookout day.

qazutar.blogspot.com *click* [no visible updates]
onessong.blogspot.com *click* [no visible updates]
deathtimestories.blogspot.com *click* [no visible updates]
carine-.blogspot.com *click* [no visible updates]
herbalfreshie.blogspot.com *click* [no visible updates]
wahhhhh. 14days lehhh.. no updates?
haha. i guess i din missed anything much ba.

well army is really an eye opener for me ba.
when i first entered, i saw people with all different kinds of hairstyles.
some of them look rather nerdy la.
and i mean it.
[when u go in right,
you will really like.. wah! this type of people still exist ah!]
Den again, there were those that look ahbeng-ish,
golden hair,
no specs,
fat.

guess the first few days were quite a torture for me ba.
all those boring lectures,
and seemingly neverending slack time.
time moved real slow.

LUCKILY,
my platoon mates are nt too bad la.
a fun bunch of wierdos,
who juz luv havin fun.
abt half of my section mates are frm uniform grps..
so their standards are considerably higher.
bloody hell. things i kannt guo de, they like yi ru fan zhang man..

Now, moving on to foodwise lehhh..
like zz say,
they always give alot alot of fd.. (nt as if its so nice la.)
another pt to note is that..
they attempt to vary their morning beverages by naming them differently, even though they all taste the same..
RICO, MILO, chocolate...
mygdness.

2 more days to book in day, book in book in,
2 more days to book in day, o book in day.
[o wait. tml muz go SDC in No.4.. sian...........]

2007-01-11T23:53:00.000+08:00

in 14 hours time,
it would be D-day le..
welll.. guess i'm already well prepared.
so let it come man!!
and please bring along great bunkmates too..
(bt pls remove the sbj/injections part)

_

2007-01-09T23:33:00.000+08:00

i feel like blogging abt sth.
bt i duno wad to blog abt..
so erm.
yar.
tt's abt it.

2007-01-03T01:42:00.000+08:00

Thoughts of a pre-enlistee.
The Army.
Since my primary school days,
i've always dreaded for the arrival of this very day.
Well, i guess nobody is looking forward to it either.
I still remember when i young, i kept taking note of how many years more would it take for me to have to be enlisted.

Often, I have seen many army men waiting for the bus to tekong,
loitering around whitesands.
and now, the ball has to be passed upon us.. the dragon babies.

well, there might be some of us who are curious,
what is going through the minds of a pre-enlistee..
are you afraid?
are you worried?
are you prepared?
well, for me, NS is something everyone has to go through.
and since, i was once in NCC, i would duo duo sao sao have a slight advantage over others liao.. (in terms of knowledge of commands, drills)
so for me, i am not so worried yet.

I ain't scared of all the punishments etc,
I ain't scared of the hardship tt i would face.
I ain't scared of the lack of hair on my head.
However, knowing that 9 days is all i have left to that dreadful day,
can still be quite a chore.

In 9days time,
i would be going to see people tt i will be suffering with for the next 3 months.
people that would go through all the scoldings/punishments with me.
i will discover and interact with people from all walks of life,
and eventually, appreciate that there are people out there, making NS bearable.
They say your 1st 3 months would be the most memorable moments of ur NS life,
and i'm going to treasure it. hopefully.

Dislikes:
- being ordered
- being punished
- being injected
- being botak
- having to venture into the unknown
- having a possiblity of recoursing
- standing broad jump
- being last.

Likes:
- none as yet.

well i'm training. i have no idea if it does help within such a short time, but i'm trying.. hope it does pay off..

9 days and counting..

2006-12-25T03:18:00.000+08:00

my only wish this year
artiste: britney
"Last night I took a walk in the snow.
Couples holding hands, places to go
Seems like everyone but me is in love.
Santa can you hear me
I signed my letter that I sealed with a kiss
I sent it off
It just said this
I know exactly what I want this year.
Santa can you hear me.
I want my baby (baby, yeah)
I want someone
to love me someone to hold me.
Maybe (maybe, maybe maybe.)
he'll be all I hope in a big red bow
Santa can you hear me?
I have been so good this year and
all I want is one thing
Tell me my true love is here
He's all I want, just for me underneath
my Christmas tree
I'll be waiting here.
Santa that's my only wish this year.
oohhh ohh yeah
Christmas Eve I just can't sleep
Would I be wrong for taking a peek?
Cause I heard that your coming to town
Santa can you hear me? (yea yeah)
Really hope that your on your way
With something special for me in your sleigh
Ohh please make my wish come true
Santa can you hear me
I want my baby (baby)
I want someone to love me someone to hold me
Maybe (maybe maybe)
they'll be all the love under the mistletoe
Santa can you hear me
I have been so good this year
And all I want is one thing
Tell me my true love is here
He's all I want just for me
Underneath my Christmas tree
I'll be waiting here Santa that's
my only wish this year
I hope my letter reaches you in time
Bring me love can call all mine
(yeah yeah) cause I have been so good this year.
Can't be long under the mistletoe
He's all want and a big red bow
Santa can you hear me (hear me?)
I have been so good this year
And all I want is one thing
Tell me my true love is near
He's all I want. just for me
Underneath my Christmas tree
I'll be waiting here (ohh yeah) Santa
that's my only wish this year
Oh Santa can u hear me? oh Santa
Well he's all I want just for me underneath
my Christmas tree
Oh I'll be waiting here
Santa that's my only wish this year."

its christmas time again.
well erm. christmas eve ain't tt wonderful for me..
- i woke up, n i realised it didn't snow.
- i realised tt my mum gave away the christmas tree, n lights.. shucks.
- i realised tt there was no chimney to my hse, n it aint the highest floor.. (tt means mister Santa cldnt get in my hse w his presents.)
well more importantly..
- i realised tt my internet connection cannt onn.. so nw i'm using other ppl connection.. oops =X shhhhhh.
- i realised i might have lost my camera.. n i juz had it repaired it like 2days ago.. damn! all photos of the development of my seedlings are all gone. i tink i shld better go invent tt "housonar".. ahhhhh! (o btw, if u din know, in order to kill my boredom, me decided to try planting some seeds tt i bot frm ntuc.. bot some sunflower seeds, n petite orange seeds.. nxt time need sunflower seeds come get frm me man! they grow damn fast...)
- i realised i had sore throat, n mild flu. shit. i'm sick.

but anyway, its christmastime. MERRY MERRY CHRISTMAS to you!

well nvm... it's okay.. i understand.

2006-12-15T01:14:00.000+08:00

Person A: hey u think your grandmother road ahh. like that slowly stroll in the middle of the road..
Person B: aiya.... nvm la no car.
this is usually a normal reply.

Person A: hey u think your grandmother road ahh. like that slowly stroll in the middle of the road..
Person B: no la. is my dad's road..
Person A: my dad sold it to ur dad..
Person B: haiyoo.. u got it all wrong le la.. my grandfather juz bought it back!
this is a spastic reply.

and now.. we have.
Person A: hey u think your grandmother road ahh. like that slowly stroll in the middle of the road..
Person B: no. is my road.

i stumbled across some of the roads while planning for the night cycling trip, and i made a few startling discovery.
Candidate no.1
SOPHIA.
Occupation: ex-student of TJC.
Gender: Female.
Level of wealth: 10.5/5
Owner of: Sophia Road.
Home: Sophia View, Sophia Ville, sophia lodge, sophia mansion etc.
Remarks: too rich. better make friends with her.. gt new stuff ready by 2011..

Candidate no. 2.5
Sandy
Gender: Female.
Level of wealth: 3.5/5
Owner of: Sandy Lane.
Remarks: well erm.. haha. i guess the picture explains it all.
gray.gyar.gayr.gary.

all these rich people.... grrrr

2006-12-08T23:05:00.000+08:00

there's a time and a place for everyone..
have u found urs today?

grad com

2006-12-06T00:55:00.000+08:00

the grad com sux.
its a long story..
when we submitted it, it was 8-7, they said ok.

21 november 7pm: caroline called to say they gt too many people le. we offered to be at most 9-6, 10-5.

22-24 november 10am: those bloody people, insists we be 11-4.. if not pay the surplus. we say cannot. ask me spk to their tcher, i agreed, and she say he went abroad liao. diao....
told her 10-5 last call... and if any other problem, call ly, cos i going thailand liao.
apparently, those bastards din call ly, and automatically assumed we are fine with it.

5th december 11PM: caroline called me and say they counted wrongly, and tot we are 11-3, so that meant we had to be 11-3-1.. i was like... "grrr. welldone ahh. juz go die la!" anyway, what's done is done, we had to look i decided that the best alternative now, 'd be to seat in 10-3-2, given tat we had no choice now. so that's how the events unfold.

[edited: and juz when i tot everything wld be smooth flowing from den on, down came two big problem.
problem 1: they did not change the seats according to the name. some people who were supposed to be seating on another table were not given the right table no.
problem 2: apparantly they couldnt assure us the two seater table, as theywanted to break the cls of 10 into 9-1.. so that poor guy obviously didnt want to move, and hence creating a big hoohaa of people not having enuf seats. in e end, hadta be seated in a 10-3-1 arrangement..]

the sc is really sucky. and to tink i even tot they were a better batch than weldon..
i mean.. just look at their ticket.
no time,
no place,
no date,
no table no.
look at their bloody drawing.. not say v nice or what har.. juz some slipshod work.
look at the quality of the paper.. i spent 80overdollars leh. give me a better ticket lah!
look at the way they tried to make it look slightly complicated by addin in the sticker.. hua she tian zhu.
juz by looking at the ticket tells me alot abt them.

[edited: oya. actually i know this differs from ppl to ppl, but i dun really think the food was worth it. i guess the only dishes i enjoyed were
the berry dish,
the scallop and not the soup,
the chicken skin,
the pathetically small prawn,
and of cos the last of the 5 items on the list - the tea.]

w taht said, there's nothing we can do abt this either..
now the only people i feel guilty abt is those who i persuaded and they had to be seperated.
if only i had not persuaded anyone..
i've tried my best.
sorry.

the three things

2006-12-03T01:41:00.000+08:00

i've got 3 things to blog abt.

ONE. dun try the new blogger beta version, if u haven tried it. i carn find why it is any better than the old one, except for the new fonts on the "save as draft" and "publish" buttons... and the super annoying REPEATED [this is the focus] type-ur-password box. (well like some might say, "maybe i dunno hw to use it properly yet", but its really annoying me..)

TWO. i've just read one of my friend blog, and i can like totally understand how he feels. even though the time, event, place of occurance, and victim is like totally different. but it all boils down to the same principle. its not a matter of what time, or where. but more of why wld someone actually tink of doing that in the first case.. even ppl we dun noe dun do it. why wld friends. my friends, even do it!! (when i mean "it", means the more severe-beyond-friend-friend/s-kind of actions.. k mb i'm more of refering to that incident abt 2 wks ago..) [this is the focus]. think b4 u act, for your actions do affect people.

[not for those who prefers to indulgein the "joy of shopping"]
THREE. i was shopping for my prom clothes and i suddenly thought of this. if one day, we cld actually just sit down and admire the crowd of ppl rushing thru, we cld actually notice alot of things. take for instance dressing. every single clothing that ppl wear, are actually one of the best they cld find amongst the places they visited. it is either best in the sense that
-it's the cheapest deal they cld get,
-it's the most in fashion gear they cld find,
-it's the most classy gown they cld wear,
-it's a cls thing..
not counting the no-choice-but-to-wear kind (uniform/work attire)
in all ways, it is certainly the best clothes they cld ever find. [this is the focus]
so by just seating down and STARING at ppl's dressing,
we wld actually be able to view all the best clothes in the world. ok. mb singapore.
just think, wld anybody buy sth that they feel it ain't good?
ppl wld surely pick the best they cld find... even if it means within a particular shop.
shopping for clothes is such a hassle.
maybe one day, we shld just sit down and wait.
and if we found a liking to someone's shirt,
just approach he/she and ask where them bot it from.
now that's so much easier.
[not for those who prefers to indulgein the "joy of shopping"]

just imagine.. this is the amount of choices i cld seek in a split second.

2006-11-30T00:59:00.000+08:00

here are some of the more wierd encounters i had in BANGKOK...

the elongated watermelon..

the high tech tut tut with a tv set..

this is one of the best taken boat photos out of the dozens we took.

the feather duster man.

singaporeans ain't tt kiasu afterall. this bus has 24 red backlights.. my goodness!

our very homemade cookies with an innovative name.

there're so many cars in bangkok tt number plates are not a neccessity anymore..

its the yellow day!

the new kind of Singaporean policemen.. stylo sia!

found this shell outside the hse. snake egg?!

this is what happens when the airport is too small.. - ppl hafta resort to walking on tthe rootop.
cool rite!
the last photo